Posted to KinNet, Sept. 23, 1999

by Larry Hallock

I’m turning in my credentials as a missionary. I’ve never been good at it.

When Union College decided to sponsor its first Student Missionary, I applied—but they picked somebody else.*  Decades later, Kinship sent me out as a representative to certain SDA colleges and other organizations—but never to the one where I really wanted to work: Oakwood College.  (wink)

And now, on KinNet, I am unaware of rescuing a single person from the evils of fundamentalism, nor have I convinced anyone to read my favorite book, The Road Less Traveled. Not to my knowledge. I have little to show for my “domination” of the KinNet e-space.

So I give up mission work.

Sort of. Actually there is one mission field I might still consider: myself. I know it sounds a little odd, picking the most difficult mission spot in the world after being such a failure in easier places.

But when I think of the new millennium just around the corner—which I choose to celebrate at the close of this year like everybody else (so what if we’re technically off by one one-thousandth of a millennium?)—I’d like to turn over a huge new leaf. I want the millennial new leaf to have gold-gilded edges, embossed lettering, the works.

If that new page is to look any different from the rest, it’s gonna take a lot of extra effort. I need to start now, getting ready, using the time between now and December 31 to practice. (Goofing up right after New Year’s is so discouraging!) For example, I’m already taking my friend Vickie’s advice and not listening to hate radio so much. The negativity isn’t worth it just to stay informed as to what the crazies are saying. So take a hike, Dr. Laura. Bye-bye, Rush.

I'm even steering clear of KinNet messages about the church and Bible texts and doctrines and the results of sin in the world. Sometimes to hear new music, you have to close the door behind you, shutting out what has become noise.

Plus I’m gonna get my life more organized, if possible, not merely distinguishing between the urgent versus the important, but actually acting accordingly. Hey, for me this will be a challenge, as I was taught to live for tomorrow. But now that I’m mindful that life is what happens while one is busy making plans, the first words I’ll put on that new page for January 1, 2000, will be: Live it today!

So I’m getting ready for 2000. Experimenting with my priority list. Changing mission fields. You may have noticed I’ve been in read-only mode a lot lately—and not posting at all on my favorite topics. (“If the horse is dead, get off!”) I'm not leaving the forum, just making it work better for me. I’ve started a class on Wednesday evenings.... I’m determined to read more.... And I’m gonna buy some handcuffs and lock myself to high-priority projects until they are done. (Okay, so I won’t have to buy them.)

Maybe I’ll even find time to practice my celebrity impressions and do them for you at Kampmeeting 2000 in Hawaii—like this one (speaking of mission fields) depicting the first missionaries landing on the shores of Africa or wherever: They’re in the boat, coming to shore, their leader standing in the bow. He shields his eyes with one hand while tossing clothes to the natives with the other, shouting (albeit in English), “Here. Put these on first, ...then we’ll save you!”

Now that I’ve decided to be my own mission field, I’m not sure exactly how I’ll perform that ritual. Oh well. I’ll figure it out.

Happy New Millennium, and huggies to all,

                                —Larry (who doesn’t really own a set of handcuffs)

*

A millennial reflection